Starvation

Time: 7:00pm
Mood: Excited (I just had another bright idea for my wedding! *yay*)
Song of the moment: Modest Mouse - Float On (it's playing on my iTunes)

I never bring enough food to work. No matter how many snacks I bring to work, I always end up rationing my food just so it can last me through the day. Ok I lied. I don't vary the amount of snacks I bring to work, I actually end up bringing the same snacks each day, knowing fully that it will not last me through the day. I guess it could be because of the lack of snack selection I have at home. My parents aren't big snackers. They have like trail mix, seeds, nuts, both in loose and bar form. What they call "healthy" snacks. But I want junk, so that stuff doesn't appeal to me. My parents tell me to buy my own snacks. I do, but I either get yelled at because of the trans fats content, or I end up eating.. maybe 50% of it. Who takes the other 50%? My parents... more specifically my dad. I think the way my parents see it is this: buying junkfood is bad. Eating it is bad, but buying it is even worse. Since I've covered the greater of two evils, eating it isn't all the bad.

So back to this whole business about not bringing enough snacks. By the end of the day I am absolutely starving. To minimize the starving-effect, I've planned it so I have my last snack at around 4:30, half an hour before I leave for work. It kills the hunger pains for the ride home, but the moment I get home, I snack like there is no tomorrow.. and I completely ruin my appetite for dinner.

So what's the solution here? I bring the same amount of snacks, I end up starving by the end of the day (and possibly ruin my dinner due to all the snacking I do when I get home). If I opt to bring more snacks, I have to buy my own snacks, potentially loosing half of it to my parents, which will lead me back to square one. I've tried to store snacks at work, but then I over-indulge and I eat all of it (I have no self control!!). Not to mention the fact that several weeks ago I had this small cockroach crawl across my desk. That was discusting. And that has discouraged me from storing food for prolong periods of time in my desk. I feel as if I'm destined to starve....